I just had my interview on KNX 1070 NEWSRADIO - CBS Los Angeles. The producer told me that the segment only lasts for 2 - 2 1/2 minutes, but that Bob Brill gave me 4 minutes because he liked what I had to say.

I covered the fact that the biggest mistake people make when divorcing is not to consider the process they want to use BEFORE selecting an attorney. Family law is litigation. Therefore, if people don't determine the process they want to use BEFORE selecting an attorney, the chances are that they will end up hiring a litigator.

Bob thought that the average cost of a divorce is $5,000. I clued him in that the average cost of a divorce in the United States is $20,000 per person. I explained that while mediation tends to be less expensive, it also depends upon what people want to cover in the mediation. For example, they want to address the actual issues that led to the breakdown of their marriage because they may have an ongoing relationship because of children.

We discussed the fact that governments all over the world have stated that disputes arising in interpersonal relationships should not be litigated because of the damage that litigation is known to cause.

I mentioned that family law cases are considered the vampires of the legal system because the cases never seem to die. The reason for this is that the adversarial process (litigation) either creates a winner/loser or loser/loser. In either instance, the perceived loser frequently returns to court in an effort to try and win. This results in an ongoing cycle.

I explained that when people are tied together for life, it is a BAD idea to do things that lead to a tug-of-war that will continue between them until one of them finally dies. By creating such a dynamic, the tug-of-war continues until one of the parents finally dies. At that point, the child(ren) are left both grieving the loss of a parent and feeling a sense of relief that the tug-of-war ended. After all, the surviving parent can't play that "game" alone. The child(ren)'s sense of relief is the same, regardless of which parent was responsible and to what degree because the "game" ends once one of their parents dies.

Immediately after the interview, I received a phone call from my colleague, Leslie Howell. She happened to be listening to the program and didn't realize that I was scheduled to be interviewed by Mr. Brill. She called to tell me that it was a pleasant surprise and that I did great.

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